Thursday, February 7, 2019

The Frozen Truth

Getting at the truth of a matter is not always about uncovering a mysterious resource.  Sometimes it is nothing more puzzling than believing what is before one's eyes. The complication arises from the reluctance to express a reality that conflicts with what we might prefer to think. In effect the problem is not the truth, it's us. We have not only to believe what we see but also to act upon it.  Acting upon it may entail the even more uncomfortable betrayal of our own malefic anger at the condition we've recognized.  When for example one is happily engaged in moralizing and running another into the ground for their exceedingly low and unbecoming behaviour, it is unsettling to confess one's own vociferous condemnation. We quickly convert from the condemned to the executioner - and frequently with a gusto that surprisingly surpasses our hitherto high-road conduct.

The good news is that the admission of one's own tetchiness affords a palatable reason for the original objection even though the initial cause is not the same.  It is far easier to digest one's own annoyances than to fathom the cause of another's; plus it legitimizes the authenticity of the root gripe and contemporaneously removes the bed of uncertainty which so often surrounds the dissection of other people - as dedicated as we may once have been to their censure. Clarity, clarity!

This then was the substance of my early morning cycle along Gulf of Mexico Drive beneath the azure sky and yellow sunshine. Sunlight really is the best disinfectant! On the one hand I had summarily distanced myself from a bothersome acquaintance; on the other hand, I was inspired to care for a long-standing friend. I called him from my customary bench at Bayfront Park. What I heard was the natural disturbance one endures when hounded by Canada Revenue Agency.  Apparently my friend's blossoming psychological and alcoholic difficulties over the past several years had abridged his statutory tax filings. He reported having hired H&R Block but seems to have encountered difficulties collecting the data.  I reminded him that mankind has proven its ability to get a man onto the moon so this conundrum can be resolved. Speaking politically I suggested it might improve his experience with the mandarins handling Her Majesty's interests if he were to adopt a conciliatory approach rather than the usual belligerent attitude to which they are accustomed. My friend agreed. I could tell that he appreciated my confidence in the foreseeable resolution of his difficulties. No doubt he is torn having to deal with these challenges on his own - residing as he is by necessity in a public half-way house for those in need of medical supervision. It made my own problems less vexing.

Thus expiated of my inadequacies I hastened my return to the beach where shortly I was reclined on a chaise longue absorbing the radiation. Nearby three residents were having a heated disagreement but sanity and manner ostensibly prevailed. Yet another reminder that no one is spared the granular nature of life from time to time. It was over an hour later that I submitted to my desire to swim in the sea.  The lower channels of water seemed cooler today than yesterday but nonetheless invigorating.  The saline flavour of the water was more noticeable as well, providing that cleansing effect I so value.

Later I traipsed along the shore southward towards the Longboat Club resort. The exercise was killing. Upon my return to the condominium beachfront I went for another swim then recovered in the late afternoon setting sun before retiring for the evening.

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